Warehouse Update: Someone Taught the Alpacas How to Use Soap Dispensers!

We regret to inform you that the situation is… extremely slippery!

It started with one alpaca — a curious, fluffy pioneer who pressed the soap dispenser with the innocent intention of “seeing what happens”. What happened was foam. A lot of foam!

Within minutes, the alpacas discovered that the dispensers make fun noises and produce mysterious bubbles. Within ten minutes, they realized that pressing the dispenser repeatedly creates a “soap waterfall”. Within twenty minutes, the warehouse had transformed into a shimmering, frothy wonderland where visibility dropped to zero and morale dropped even lower.

Current Warehouse Conditions

• Floors: 98% soap
• Alpacas: 100% slippery
• Staff: 40% confused, 60% resigned
• Productivity: Somewhere beneath the foam, probably!

Several alpacas have declared themselves “Bubble Captains” and are navigating the warehouse using improvised soap‑surfing techniques. One alpaca attempted a triple‑spin‑foam‑flip and is now stuck to a pallet of greeting cards. We are working on extraction.

Impact on Orders

If your package arrives slightly damp, suspiciously shiny, smelling like citrus, or wearing a tiny bubble hat, please understand that the alpacas are doing their best — but their best is currently very slippery!

What We’re Doing About It

• Turned off all soap dispensers
• Unplugged the automatic ones
• Hidden the refill bottles
• Posted a sign that says “NO FOAM ZONE” (the alpacas ate it)

We are now attempting to lure the alpacas out of the bubble zone using dry towels and motivational speeches.

Expected Return to Normal Operations

We estimate the warehouse will return to normal once the foam settles, the alpacas stop sliding, and someone finds the floor again. Realistically, this may take a while!